One of the most troubling aspects of sibling loss is our sense of powerlessness. Grieving brothers and sisters often feel hopeless and frustrated because nothing can be done to change the terrible events that resulted in their present misery. While it’s true that there are few things that can ease the suffering associated with profound loss, it is possible to tap into the healing powers of our dreams. It’s clear that most grieving people find deep meaning and consolation in their dreams of deceased loved ones. In fact, most mourners hope and pray for such dreams. Because grief dreams are a universal phenomenon among the bereaved, they offer the opportunity, when affirmed as important and properly understood, for healing. Grief dreams allow us to reconnect with our deceased loved ones, to return to that place where nothing has changed—a place where our loved one is still alive—a place where grief does not exist. In one incredible, magical moment, the chasm of death and despair evaporates, and we are given a few precious moments with our beloved sibling. And herein lies the amazing power of the grief dream.
In attempting to understand the nature of grief dreams, it’s helpful to recognize that most grief dreams fall into four rather broad categories:
The Four Types of Grief Dreams
- The visitation dream
- The message dream
- The reassurance dream
- The trauma dream
Of course, not all grief dreams fit into these specific categories. For example, some grief dreams may have elements of more than one dream type—such as a dream that is both a message dream and a reassurance dream. Each type is briefly summarized below.
The Visitation Dream
In the visitation dream, you merely spend time with the deceased. These dreams may recall a forgotten memory, sometimes from childhood. Often, there is no prophetic message or warning in the dream; rather, it’s just a “final visit.” Such visits may be quiet and pensive, or they might come in the form of joyous reunions.
The Message Dream
In the message dream, you receive some sort of important information, instruction, or even warning from the deceased. For example, your brother may appear in a dream and warn you to take better care of your health, or your sister may appear in a dream to remind you not to work so hard. Message dreams are usually brief and overt. Sometimes, the message is intended for someone other than you. For example, your brother may appear in a dream and tell you to visit his wife and remind her how much he loves her.
The Reassurance Dream
The reassurance dream is a consoling dream that encourages you to take comfort. Quite often, your brother or sister will offer a much-needed affirmation that you are doing a good job, or perhaps doing the right thing, in a particular area of life. Sometimes, the deceased tells you not to worry because he or she is doing well in the afterlife. These dreams are usually very comforting, and you may revel in their aftereffects for a long time.
The Trauma Dream
The most disturbing grief dream is the trauma dream. Less common than the other types of grief dreams, the trauma dream often comes in the form of a flashback, especially in early grief and particularly in cases of traumatic deaths, such as murders, suicides, and accidents. Many times, you feel powerless and afraid. Yet, despite the feelings of fear and dread this dream brings, over time, you may come to view the dream as healing. Often, the act of simply reuniting, even if it relives a traumatic time for you and your sibling, is strangely comforting.
Finding Comfort Through Grief Dreams
Grief dreams can serve as gentle reminders that our loved one is still part of our life. In fact, these dreams can help us in the painful adjustment process that is part of every grief journey. Finally, grief dreams allow us to transcend the limits of space and time and to have what every grieving person desires most: just one more visit.
In the next four blogs, I will be discussing the types of grief dreams in more detail.
For more information on Grief Dreams, see https://a.co/d/07874cYh